I think jealousy is romantic to a certain extent and I know many will disagree, but jealousy is  such a powerful emotion, one that just about everyone feels at one time or another. In the wrong hands, it can cause extreme envy and avarice. In the right hands, it can make a stupid man(or woman) realize what’s sitting right under their very nose and cherish it all the more.
Personally, I like to see my hubby in the grips of the green eyed monster every once in a while. Not that it happens often when you’ve been married over 12 years, but the rare occasions it does, I am filled with a guilty pleasure. Might I even say, a certain erotic delight.

I like knowing that my hubby doesn’t want to share me. That he considers me, “his”. It makes me feel desirable and loved. And do I feel the same in return? Damned straight. Knowing other women desire him is a source of pride, even if it drives me insane.  Do I like it? No, but we both tend to reap the benefits because it usually means when we get home I tear off his clothes and remind him of why I’m so special. And lucky me, he reminds me right back.

However, my enjoyment of his covetous nature does have boundaries. For example, I would never condone him attacking someone who complimented me, or to verbally or physically abuse me because he cannot handle his emotions. Some lines should never be crossed. But, grabbing me close to give me a deep kiss, maybe squeezing my ass in plain public thus reaffirming my taken status? Totally acceptable. Even encouraged.

Jealousy is a normal emotion, a strong one at times, that can rouse feelings of insecurity and inadequacy. Many couples have suffered at one time or another from the angst of the green eyed monster. In some cases, it can unfortunately devolve into unhealthy accusations, and violence. Hitting your partner because you can’t handle your emotions is not acceptable under any circumstances. Jealousy should never be used as an excuse to hurt the one you love, to make nasty, unfounded accusations or to do anything that requires extreme forgiveness or a restraining order.  If you are truly in love, truly a couple, then trust should be stronger than jealousy. Belief in your partner and their affection for you should be all the reassurance you need. If not, then seek counseling, but never, ever hurt each other. Some acts and words can never be erased. 

But let’s move past unhealthy jealousy onto the non-dysfunctional kind because jealousy, after all, comes in many forms and not all of them are evil or painful. The one I’m familiar with is the kind that arises within a couple where one fears losing the other to someone who might offer more–is she prettier, younger, sexier? In my world, that type of insecure jealousy is resolved simply by my better half–my dear hubby–showing with words and actions–the erotic kind–just how much I am loved and cherished for just being me. It can provide a reaffirmation of their bond to each other.

That’s one type, then there’s the jealousy that arises when you see someone that has something you don’t have, but suddenly realize you want. Examples would be where acquaintances for years suddenly realize their friend is someone worth having. It happens when two coworkers start dating and you fantasize about being in their place. It’s your BFF’s big brother never seeing you as more than a sister until one day he realizes you’re all grown up but with someone else.

However, what happens when the one you want is in a relationship and happy? What happens if the one you covet wants you in return–but also wants to keep their other lover? What does it take to shed inhibitions and pride to be with the one you desire? To share a home and a bed with third person all for the sake of loving someone?

I don’t know if I could ever go that far. Even the very idea of someone else touching my hubby drives me insane with jealousy. But, while I don’t feel a need to explore a threesome in my own world, I do explore it in my soon-to-be released book Jealous and Freakn’, coming out November 20th.

In the story, Mitchell’s been avoiding Francine, his sister’s BFF, for years because Francine totally thinks they’re meant to be together. Everything changes when Mitchell sees Francine getting involved with another man. But when she refuses to give Alejandro up, can Mitchell get past his jealousy to become a threesome with the woman he loves? Oh, and to add a little fun to the mix, did I mention they’re all shapeshifters?!

Steamy action, jealous antics and more abound in this stand alone sequel to Delicate Freakn’ Flower. For an excerpt and more, click the Books link. Also keep an eye out in the blogsphere because there are going to be numerous giveaways for a copy of my latest book in the Freakn’ Shifters series.

I do hope you enjoy, and remember, the next time the little green eyed monster plays you a visit, use it as an opportunity to show the one you love just how much you love them. Naked of course 

Halloween is my hubby’s favorite holiday (although he does love Christmas even if he complains I go overboard lol). He’s got 3 bins of creepy decorations at this point and every year we add to his piles of stuff. I am especially excited about the bloody gel handprints I found to stick in our front window. So delightfully gross. We’ve also acquired, from our local Dollarama, a ferocious looking plastic rat with red eyes and fanglike teeth, a rope with styrofoam skulls and a new plaque that reads ‘Unload the dead bodies at he back.’ Lol. Gotta love Halloween.

Still on the list to do, other than decorate the day before, is hit the pumpkin farm where we will visit the smelly animals and listen to the kids giggle because they saw something poop. Scream in disgust as the cow eats a corn on the cob from our hands and slimes us. Run wild through the twelve foot tall corn maze (which I’ll admit, even in daylight, is kind of freaky). Ooh and watch the cannon launch pumpkins to explode in the field. The kids love watching the splatter. Okay, I’ll admit it, I enjoy it too Then there’s the wagon ride into the field itself where my son and hubby hunt for the biggest freakn’pumpkin they can find. My oldest daughter looks for a large but perfectly round one. Then there’s the little one who grabs one, declares it’s perfect, then puts it down, then grabs another, then changes her mind. This goes on for a while. Me, I get a small, green striped one that I can carry easily along with the little one’s once she settles on the perfect one.

Carving is an all afternoon affair, with hubby diving in right alongside the kids creating masterpieces. The children like to follow a paper pattern, but my hubby loves to get inventive. For several years, we had the puking pumpkin, always a hit. Last year, we had the pooping pumpkin sitting on a potty hubby built replete with toilet paper, and a fresh pie crust courtesy of me. Ooh, and a pig pureed pile of pumpkin mush right under our pumpkins butt in the pie shell. The sign of course read ‘Fresh Pumpkin Pie’. Perhaps not original, but damn did we laugh our faces off.

Another tradition too, that I follow courtesy of my paranoid mother, is the sorting of the candy bags once they get home. Despite my not understanding it, people still do nasty things to kids candy instead of turning off their porch light. So every year, I dump that candy out and I look for things that are unwrapped, homemade, or just plain weird looking. Those get trashed. Then I pull out the stuff my kids won’t eat, that languish in the cupboard. I yank the bowl of good candy I bought for trick-or-treaters and replace it with the stuff my kids hate lol. I know, horrible of me. Anybody else do that?

One of these years I hope I can get over my self consciousness and actually dress up for the occasion. I’d love to be one of those parents who dons the wig, makeup and outfit, embarrassing their kids royally. LOL, seems like so much fun if I wasn’t such a wussy. While it won’t happen this year, maybe it will the next.

What about you? Are you doing anything special for Halloween? Do you have any traditions? And is it just in Canada that the porch light rule exists?

I don’t mean to me personally (although I’ve read some really nasty reviews that make my brows raise and make me go “WTF?”) I am talking about the anonymous meanness exhibited on the internet in the form of comments left on newspaper articles, blogs and even Facebook. I’m sure you’ve seen it.

If our city paper runs an article on a tragic accident where a child dies, there’s people screaming the parents should be charged and put to death, and that the parents deserved it for not being glued to the child’s side every second of the day. Where’s the sympathy for the grieving family? Are people so morally bankrupt they think that’s okay?

A celebrity is caught cheating, and cruel jokes about the victimized spouse emerge about them not being good enough hence why the other had to stray. Really? Because the commenters obviously know first hand what’s going on in that relationship, fter all, it is so everybody’s business. Not!

Politicians do their double speak and nasty threats about what they’d like to do to them are rampant and gruesome. Sure, those in office lie, but still, are we that savage that those kind of violent remarks are acceptable? You don’t like who’s running your city/province/country? Then try voting instead.

The examples of intentional cruelty are staggering and everywhere. It’s appalling.

Don’t, get me wrong, I also see beautiful things on the internet, supportive messages for families dealing with loss or hardship, and a whole lot of love. But unfortunately, the rabid screaming a of a few, who seem to think the anonymity of the internet gives them the right to spill their vitriol, makes it unpleasant especially when you need to wade through so much of it to read the real comments left by people who still have moral values.

I’ve been on the internet a long, long time now, from back when I used a modem to dial in and I got a feeble connection to use an AltaVista search that took a while for a few hundred results. Years later, I’m still a huge internet fan, loving the ability to discover at the tip of my fingers. But the greater and wider spread the internet becomes, the more I’m seeing hate, and not just hate, but pointless, evil remarks against even the most innocent of things. Why? When did manners stop applying? When did it become alright to ridicule and even ridicule someone’s grief? I don’t care who you think you are, it’s never all right when you read an article about a child suiciding from bullying to read a remark saying the kids was a loser and did the right thing. WTF?! Seriously. What is wrong with these people?

I know it’s not something we can fix. Some people will always feel entitled to speak their mind whether what they say has any worth or not, with no regard for the feelings of others, and this is why I try so carefully to monitor my own children’s usage of the internet. Why I attempt at every turn to teach them to treat others like they want to be treated. To know that whenever they post something on line, it’s there forever, and there are always consequences to their words and actions.

Unfortunately, there seem to be thousands of people out there who never had a parent or guardian or even a friend who cared enough to teach them right from wrong. That’s so sad. I’m sure some of those same bullies will read this and have some choice words for me just proving my point. Will it make them feel happier for doing it? Maybe, because for them, causing someone misery gives them pleasure. I wonders how they’d feel if the tide turned and the crap they liked to spread comes back to cover them. One can only hope.

Have you seen the cyber bullying and meanness? Have you ever had it directed at you? How do you deal with it? Me, I hit delete, but I’m worried about my kids. Especially my oldest. She’s at that fragile time in her life where every word has meaning, whether true or not. I need to protect her self esteem, but how do I do that without curtailing all her internet privileges? Is it even possible anymore to protect our children without taking away the very technology that makes todays world so interesting?

A worried mom wants to know.

And I will admit, it is my favorite season, although spring with it’s sense of renewal is in close second. I enjoy the brisk breezes, the changing leaves and the ability to go outside without perspiring. I love the smell the air gets, a crisp scent that I love to have flowing through the house. As fall approaches so does Halloween and pumpkin picking and racing through a cornfield maze. Fall means, Thanksgiving dinner at the dining room table using the fancy dishes as my kids call them and seeing family. I can start shopping for Christmas now without guilt, snagging the items I know my little ones will love before the mad dash. I also turn one year older in the fall, but I don’t mind, because birthdays are no cooking or cleaning days. We order in or get take out. This year, I’m begging for Texas Burger and their drool-licious souvlaki dinner. Mmmm….

What I don’t like about fall is it means snow and frigid temperatures are coming, but I do enjoy spending time indoors as a family playing video games and watching movies. It means Sunday baking where the little one gets eggshells in the dough, and the older ones fight over who gets to stir. I love the smell and warmth of a house that’s cooking when you’ve come in from the fresh outdoor. I even enjoy Sunday football and spending a few dollars on a Proline ticket.

What about you? What’s your thoughts on fall? And what’s your favorite season?

Lol, I’m practicing my howl for when Betraying Pack Law releases September 16th. Four wolves, one human, and a whole lot of danger–and I don’t just mean to her sexual state of mind. Picking up a few years after Defying Pack Law ended, it features a new heroine, a whole new yummy bunch of wolves, and a visit from old friends.

But enough about that. Fall is fast approaching, which means time to batten down the hatches and prepare for the cold, long winter. . Our above ground pool needs to be drained and shut down, the garden pruned, the pool toys (all five million noodles) put away, the hoses wound, and the gazebo cover taken down. Boring stuff. But at least the approach of fall means Halloween is coming. I know hubby is eagerly planning this year’s pumpkin carving. Last year, he outdid himself with the pumpkin pooping into a pie crust with the caption fresh pumpkin pie. So awesome. This year…I guess I’ll have to wait and see.

The kids are starting to plan their costumes, and of course changing their mind every three seconds. The little one has finally decided to not be Tinker Bell this year, but that’s fine with me seeing as how that costume was used (adamantly I might add) for 3 years. I got my money’s worth out of that one lol.

I regret to say, I am not the type to dress up but I love it when other adults do. I’m very self conscious and hate bringing attention to myself. Hubby on the other hand doesn’t mind. Although, he refuses to wear the Chippendale outfit I pointed out. Spoilsport. I’ve got my eye on a marauding pirate one though in the hopes he’ll be inspired to shiver me with his timber. LOL.

So what are you up to now that the kids are back in school, and summer is fading?